Ex-IBMer... Current professional...

I am an Ex-IBMer finally...It has been a highly speculative time... Some people believing it all to be a big joke that turned out out to be shocking truth... Now, I didn't feel any different today than any other day at office. Everything was so usual except the people's behavior toward me... They had this feeling that I can't describe.. Everyone was talking abut the same thing and asking the exact same questions...Some people still found it hard to believe that I would not be walking the calculus floor again...Not for quite some time at least...

Question that comes to my mind now is that if it will make any difference in my mindset...Will not being a part of IBM make any difference in how I look at myself....This is keeping in mind that I was a minuscule part of it and it actually didn't make any difference to the bigger universe...People move in and out of organizations everyday...I have taken the jump but will I be able to cross the quarry...After being so detached to and independent of family, Will I be able to hold on to all of it at once..Will it not overwhelm? I know it sounds negative and foolish, especially when there is no looking back...but the question still remains...

I guess Gaurav wins here...Its My way or Highway.....

Crossing the Iron Curtain...

Finally, I have decided to move on from my current position...Yes..I have resigned from IBM and now moving back to Jalandhar to join Impel....yet again..The decision has not been taken on impulse nor has it been decided overnight...It has taken a long time and a lot of thought..Of course it has its own share of speculations to it, but overall it has been a very much thought of step.. I have taken into consideration the valuable inputs from all around including, but not limited to, Prabh, Jagpal, Anshu & Nikhil. Yet manu other have expressed their doubts and concerns about the move , i guess overall it has been received well....The decision that is....Sunny is visibly upset about it, sole reason being that he would be left alone in almost a quarter of a year. Same sentiments have expressed by others at office as well, primarily Ritesh and Anshu. Jagpal has in hidden words said so as well(mai bhukkha reh jaana kanjra) but I think he is happy for me overall...

Professionally, I think it would be smart to move to my core skill. Something that I have attached myself since my school days. Impel. I don't think I can detach myself from it anyways, with or without working with them. I consider it more of working with them instead of working for them. The feeling about fact that I would be returning to base in 10 days or so is very different. I don't think I am feeling anything different though. It is mixed with pangs of sadness, confusion, sympathy and what not, but I guess it is all part of game. that is what it is at end of the day. A game which we all are trying to beat the life at.

प्यास बुझा सकता नहीं, मेरी बस इक्क पैमाना

मुझको तोह बस पीना है मय्खाने का मयखाना.

Transitions..Changes..Broader Views...

These past 15 days have been a heck of a time...Too many things and I guess too short of a time...

First things first, Gopi got married last weekend..yep our own Casanova is now committed to one.

The occasion however brought it's own set of problems for us..First we had to find a new place for us, that is Me, Prabh & Sunny. Believe me it has been the toughest job since landing in Delhi. We are finally settled into a PG now...Yep, provided the current condition we are in, it is better to live in a PG....

Second significant thing that has happened in this period is that Kapil has resigned from his position as DM quality to join another organization in a better position and better conditions. For all those who don't know who he is, I guess it doesn't matter to them. Obviously, if you don't know him then it should not concern you. Its been a quite an experience working with him. And I must say that it has not been pleasant ride all along. As with any other relationship, personal or professional, this one also had its ups and downs. We hated to love him and loved to hate him at times...It was other way round as well at some point...But I guess that happens with everyone, everywhere. Honestly, no grudges or regrets...It is all part of game I guess...You win you lose but you keep on playing... Thanks Kapil...for being there..doing that....

Third thing that is over my mind these days is actually an urge, not an event. I have this strong feeling of leaving all this and returning back to my place. This thought has been triggered by a proposal to join Impel, back at home, somewhat persistently. Manish and Terry has offered me to join back in better position and improved conditions. I would be leaving for Jalandhar this weekend to discuss he proposal. I might decide to return to base finally. I have my reservations to it though। In case I don't fit in there, like I felt earlier, I don't think I have the option to move out and start all over like I did 3 years ago. This decision would decide if these three years were invested or wasted. I have been trying to talk to Ritesh (my manager) about it for last couple of days but he is too busy to talk about anything else. I don't want it be a surprise for him. I guess it would be a shock for him. Although I know that he won't acknowledge it.

I guess somethings are better left to destiny. They should be dealt only when faced with them.

Lets see...It is just a couple of days before I am actually into the mode to decide about it. This would need a lot of thought and urging (self-urging rather) to make a move. Now I understand what crossing the Iron curtain mean.

Again. These are for you Kapeel.. :-)

करोगे याद तोह हर बात याद आयेगी, गुज़रते वक्त की हर मौज ठहर जायेगी ।

गली के मोड़ पे सूना सा कोई दरवाज़ा, तरसती आंखों से रास्ता किसी का देखेगा,

निगाह दूर तलक जाके लौट आएगी.